King Arthur Returns In England’s Greatest Hour Of Need
London-King Arthur, England’s legendary monarch, returned in response to Britain’s greatest hour of need, Tuesday.
According to legend, the King was taken to the mystical island of Avalon, following a final battle against his son by his half sister, Mordred. Once there he was buried, and it was said that he slept, and would one day wake and return to help his subjects in the hour of their greatest need. It was revealed that day was Tuesday, October 11, 2005.
It has before been speculated that Arthur returned in the form of another great Briton. Some had postulated that is was Admiral Horatio Nelson; others believed it was Arthur Wellesley, the Duke of Wellington, who shares his first name with Britain’s greatest king; while some point to Sir Winston Churchill, who led England through the Second World War; there is even a small contingent who believed he returned in the form of young Harry Potter, a fictional wizard. Arthur’s return, however, has demonstrated that these speculations are incorrect, and these men, were merely great Britons.
“I have returned, Britain, in this, your hour of greatest need,” Arthur triumphantly announced, at a press conference Tuesday afternoon, having donned a suit, after having appeared earlier in the day wearing a suit of armor.
After completing this brief statement the King opened-up for questions from the press.
“I think this is a rather obvious question,” said [New York Times Reporter] Lucille Gupta, “You remained on Avalon during two world wars and numerous other threats to Britain. Why have you chosen this time to return?”
“Dear maiden, I have returned at this time, because I am needed most urgently. The people of Britain need me desperately at this time, considering events involving two of our most important citizens. The recent cocaine related drug charges that have not only implicated the fair Kate Moss, but the honorable [gender-bending musician] George Alan O'Dowd [better known as Boy George].” the legendary King responded.
“This is by far the moment where my presence is most needed, in the 1500 years since my death,” he concluded.
This did nothing but generate more questions from the reporters assembled at Westminster Abbey, where the press conference was held.
Following his answer to Ms. Gupta’s question, the King informed his audience that he had no more time, as he had to leave promptly for a meeting he had scheduled with Prime Minister Tony Blair.
He met with the Prime Minister for several hours on Tuesday evening, when the King left 10 Downing Street, at 8:00 GMT; he declined to answer any questions posed to him by reporters.
The Prime Minister refused to comment on the subject or the contents of the pair’s meeting.
According to legend, the King was taken to the mystical island of Avalon, following a final battle against his son by his half sister, Mordred. Once there he was buried, and it was said that he slept, and would one day wake and return to help his subjects in the hour of their greatest need. It was revealed that day was Tuesday, October 11, 2005.
It has before been speculated that Arthur returned in the form of another great Briton. Some had postulated that is was Admiral Horatio Nelson; others believed it was Arthur Wellesley, the Duke of Wellington, who shares his first name with Britain’s greatest king; while some point to Sir Winston Churchill, who led England through the Second World War; there is even a small contingent who believed he returned in the form of young Harry Potter, a fictional wizard. Arthur’s return, however, has demonstrated that these speculations are incorrect, and these men, were merely great Britons.
“I have returned, Britain, in this, your hour of greatest need,” Arthur triumphantly announced, at a press conference Tuesday afternoon, having donned a suit, after having appeared earlier in the day wearing a suit of armor.
After completing this brief statement the King opened-up for questions from the press.
“I think this is a rather obvious question,” said [New York Times Reporter] Lucille Gupta, “You remained on Avalon during two world wars and numerous other threats to Britain. Why have you chosen this time to return?”
“Dear maiden, I have returned at this time, because I am needed most urgently. The people of Britain need me desperately at this time, considering events involving two of our most important citizens. The recent cocaine related drug charges that have not only implicated the fair Kate Moss, but the honorable [gender-bending musician] George Alan O'Dowd [better known as Boy George].” the legendary King responded.
“This is by far the moment where my presence is most needed, in the 1500 years since my death,” he concluded.
This did nothing but generate more questions from the reporters assembled at Westminster Abbey, where the press conference was held.
Following his answer to Ms. Gupta’s question, the King informed his audience that he had no more time, as he had to leave promptly for a meeting he had scheduled with Prime Minister Tony Blair.
He met with the Prime Minister for several hours on Tuesday evening, when the King left 10 Downing Street, at 8:00 GMT; he declined to answer any questions posed to him by reporters.
The Prime Minister refused to comment on the subject or the contents of the pair’s meeting.
posted by Patrick at 9:28 PM
2 Comments:
It's about time.
I know
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